50 Shades of Grey – The Irish Version

I don’t know what all the hype is about with this 50 shades of grey book but I got an email with the 50 Shades of Grey book Irish Style, which is basically a parody of the 50 Shades of Gray book – pretty crude but very funny.

I don’t know where the source is for this but well done to who ever created these…

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY, IRISH STYLE……..

… “Give it to me, give it to me”, he roared aggressively. Some days Mary hated working at Ulster Bank.

He slipped his hand under the red silk.. “You’re so beautiful in that dress.” he said — “Fuck off, it was only a euro in Penneys!” she replied

Bernies knees were sore and her throat was raw …. This was the longest Novena sheíd ever attended.

“You’re so tight”, he said, I’m from Cavan she replied.

Slowly he ran his finger down the middle, parting the pink softness, feeling the moist sticky centre. He loved a Mikado.

“She Quivered as I stroked her thighs. Take me in the shower Sean!” – I whispered to her “Wait til I turn on the immersion”.

Her underwear was wet as he pulled the rope. There’s great drying out today she thought as the clothes line hoisted

‘Its so long! Never seen the likes of it!’ exclaimed Mary, as she joined the dole queue

She widened her mouth, trying to fit it all in!! The Juices ran down her face. Mary did love a kebab after coppers

Sharon was panting as she let out one final scream of pure pleasure. There was nothing like beating Kilkenny in the hurling

She took a deep breath as the shivers rolled down her hot body… Jaysus, she thought. The Vicks is kicking in now!

Come on! Pump it hard.. Real hard! But it was no use the tyre was definitely punctured!

He asked if she could handle more than one finger. She said “No, I prefer a Hob Nob or a purple Snack with me tea!!”

Dalek Relaxation Tape for Humans – Funniest Viral Ever

Do you remember the Daleks from Dr. Who? Well according to this fantastic viral, the Dalek from Dr.Who will be making a return, but this time at your local spa. The stresses and strains of daily life will float away as the dalek relaxation tape for humans plays in the background.

Have a look and enjoy – I think it’s the funniest viral video ever !

Dalek Relaxation tape for Humans

 

Next time you go to the spa, just remember the Dalek Relaxation tape … relax …. then laugh out loud !

Goalkeeper Saves Penalty, Celebrates but ball rolls in (Video)

This is a great video of a goalkeeper who saves a penalty and starts to celebrate the penalty save. The goalkeeper saved the ball but the spin on the ball means that the ball continues to roll into the net while the keeper continues to celebrate – kissing his badge, even though the stadium is almost empty.

This too place September 10th, between Maghreb Fez and FAR Rabat in a decider for the quarter-finals of Morocco’s Coupe du Trone. The penalty shootout decide the winner and it was during this penalty shootout, FAR goalkeeper Khalid Askri thought he saved an important penalty and immediately began to celebrate his save. He turns his back on the goal, patting his chest and kissing his badge … what he didn’t notice is that the ball had some lots of spin on it and actually bounced and rolled back into the goal after his initial block. The referee nods and awards the goal and Askri’s team ended up losing the shootout 7-6.

A very funny sporting blooper which is sure to end up on some sports bloopers DVD for Christmas…

Henry Shefflin talks about the first 15 minutes of a game

Henry Shefflin talks about the first 15 minutes of a game

Will Lucozade Sport create a new advert where “Henry Shefflin talks about the first 15 minutes of a game”?

Lucozade Sport - Henry Shefflin first 15 minutes

Following Tipperarys drumming of Kilkenny there are plent of other jokes including this prayer…

Our father who art in Semple,
Sheedy be thy name,
thy Liam will come,
goals will come from Eoin Noel and Larry,
give us this day to stop a 5 in a row and forgive us our square ball,
as we block those who trespass against us,
but deliver us from the cockey Cats,
for Tipperary is the kingdom,
where Liam belongs forever and ever Amen

I’ve Got the Leaving by Colm and Jim Jim

I heard this the other morning on the Colm and Jim Jim breakfast show on 2FM and I thought it was hilarious.
Its a re-work of the Black Eyes Peas song “I’ve gotta feeling” but for those doing the Leaving Cert.

Enjoy!


 

I pity this years leaving cert students, with the World Cup starting during the Leaving Cert – must be hard to study with such distractions as Facebook, World Cup and of course with the Leaving Cert starting in a few days we can be guaranteed some good weather too!

Best of luck to all sitting this year !

Volcano Jokes have erupted on the web

Following the volcano in Iceland, jokes have started to follow. There are plenty of volcano jokes out there and these are some volcano jokes which were found on the internet.

  • It’s a bit early for Iceland volcano jokes. We should wait awhile for the dust to settle.
  • Waiter, there’s volcanic ash in my soup. I know, it’s a no-fly zone.
  • I came out my house yesterday and was hit on the head by a bag of frozen sausages, a chocolate gateau and some fish fingers. I realised it must be the fallout from Iceland.
  • It was the last wish of the Icelandic economy that its ashes be spread over Europe.
  • Iceland goes bankrupt, then it manages to set itself on fire. This has insurance scam written all over it.
  • Volcano in Iceland. What next Earthquake in Asda?
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